Disclaimer!!
by torama-san
Summary: A parody of those fics that force the poor characters say the disclaimer. Please review!!


Disclaimer!!!   
  
Warning: The characters are a OOC, I did this on propuse so don't hate me  
  
"Hello there I'm torama, da' tiger demon, an' I'm here with a new fic called 'Disclaimer', but before da' fic   
Akane-chan here will do the disclaimer"   
  
We see Akane sitting in the middle of the room reading a Slayers manga, strangelly its one of the 'Try' saga,   
an' I say strangelly 'cause it hasn't apeared it yet, not even in japan   
  
"Hey! 'kane!" I yell at her, she stops reading and start looking at me   
  
"What do you want?"   
  
"come here and say the disclaimer thingy"   
  
"disclaimer?" she asked confused  
  
"yea, I'm doin' a new fic"   
  
"really?"   
  
"why, yes" I say smiling   
  
"I beg you pardon, but, Who the heck are you?" she asks ruddly   
  
"I'm torama"   
  
"torama? tiger horse?"   
  
"no, no, torama" I make a pause "Da' tiger demon!!"   
  
"a demon?"   
  
"yea, a mazouku"   
  
"like in slayers?"   
  
"yea"   
  
"ho, and why do you say da' instead of the?"   
  
"because I like to say da'"   
  
"just that?"   
  
"yea, an' da' is cooler" Akane sweetdrops   
  
"well, What did you want me to do?"   
  
"I want you to read the disclaimer thingy" I say while giving her a card with something wrote in it  
  
"and whats this?"   
  
"The disclaimer thingy!!"   
  
"ahh, And whats its name?"   
  
"disclaimer!"   
  
"no, not the disclaimer, I mean the fic"   
  
"ahh, well, Its called... Disclaimer!"   
  
"no, not the disclaimer, the fic, the title of the fic"   
  
"yes, the title is disclaimer"   
  
"disclaimer?"  
  
"yep!"  
  
"what a stupid name" she swetdroped  
  
"will ya say it or not?"   
  
"what?"   
  
"The disclaimer!!"   
  
"you didn't write the fic yet stupid"   
  
"the disclaimer not the fic!!"   
  
"but you say..."   
  
"just read the card please!!" I yell at her as my anger is rising   
  
"okey" She starts reading it and after a moments she facefaults   
  
"whats wrong?"   
  
"you whant *me* to do this stupid thing?"   
  
"well, yes"   
  
"no way! I'm the costar in Ranma 1/2, I'm Ranma's real fiancee"   
  
"thats why its important that you read it" I say smiling   
  
"ask Ukyou or maybe Mousse"   
  
"but they are not that popular"   
  
"so?"   
  
"If you dont read it I will not make any fic where you get lucky with Ranma"   
  
"but i get lucky with him every night"   
  
"what? since when?"   
  
she blushes deeply   
  
"since Jusendo"   
  
"ya mean before the wedding attempt?"   
  
"yes"   
  
"what a strange girl, well, but if you dont read it I will, I will, I will make a Ranma-onna/Mousse romance fic!"   
  
"WHAT?" She asks yelling and tring to hit me with that mallet of her  
  
"you heard me!"   
  
"well, if you incist I will do it"   
  
"please read it"   
  
"read what?"   
  
"THE DISCLAIMER!!!!" I make Soun's demon head atack (TM) scaring Akane   
  
"okey, here it goes" she starts readeing but doesn't say anything   
  
"well?"   
  
"I'm reading it"   
  
"but say it!"   
  
"okey"   
  
"Torama-baka doesn't own-" she was interrumped by a new demon head atack   
  
"What are you doing!!??"   
  
"reading the disclaimer"   
  
"but you gotta read it well, I'm torama-san, if you dont like it just call me torama!"   
  
"okey, dont get mad"   
  
"start again"   
  
"Torama-baka doesn'-" yet again, the demon head atack   
  
"whats wrong now?" she asks   
  
"you said it again!! just call me torama will ya?"   
  
"okey, here it goes"   
  
"Torama, happy?" I just smile "doesn't own Ranma 1/2 nor any of its characters, Rumiko Takahashi owns them, not him   
but he isn't making any money out of this stuff so don't demand him, he is just a cute tiger demon? and he has less   
cash than the average kindergarden boy, you can't be that bad! you've got internet afterall!"   
  
"well, I lied, so what?"   
  
"that was everything?"   
  
"yes, that was the damn disclaimer that you were so scared of say"   
  
Suddenly some one enters the set   
  
"Hello everybody" says the voice   
  
Akane glomps the newcomer, Ranma   
  
"Ranma!! this demon kidnaped me!!"   
  
"what?" he asks as anger fills his soul   
  
"he is much stronger than myself and he betean me up! he made me cry!!!"   
  
"What?? Who was that fool demon?"   
  
"him" she says pointing at me   
  
"me? but I only made you say the disclaimer"   
  
"the disclaimer?" Ranma asks confused   
  
"yes it was like hell Ranma-kun!!" she says sobbing histecarilly   
  
"I will kill you"   
  
"me?" I say shaking   
  
"yes, for beaten up her and-" I interrup him   
  
"But I beat up Hiroshi with luck!"   
  
"so you've also beaten up on my best friend, I will kill you fool demon from hell"   
  
"you're talking like that Kuno boy"   
  
He thinks for a moment   
  
"yes, I'm talking like him, but I will stop talking this way when I kill you"   
  
"why me?"   
  
"mmm" Ranma trys to remember why he wanted to kill me   
  
"Ranma-chan! if you kill him I will be pleased to make you lucky back at home!" yells Akane from the door  
  
"hu?" he says confuced  
  
"In the bath!" she says while giggling maddly   
  
"WHA! Kill you, Kill you, Kill you" he starts to say in a manner of a killer from a third class movie   
  
"can't say my last words?"   
  
"... you got some seconds"   
  
"okey, I've gotta say that this fic is my first comedy and to please C&C an' review but please, please don't send me   
bombs, viruses, or that kind of things"   
  
"to who was that menssage?"   
  
"to the readers, of course"   
  
"the readers? you mean that this was a fic?"   
  
"why yes, I didn't plan you to enter the scene but since I could..."   
  
"well, much pretty stuff but I've gotta kill you now"   
  
"no, you gotta go with Akane"   
  
"hu? 'kane?"  
  
"Yes, she said that she waited you in the bath"   
  
"YES! I REMEMBER NOW!! I've gotta go, bye!" he starts running towards the Tendo dojo   
  
"Ha! stupid! I've fooled the great pigtailed martail artist!" I say while running as fast as I can in the oposite direction   
  
"COME BACK HERE YOU FOOL DEMON!!!" yells someone, I look at Ranma and note that he is fling   
  
"since when you can fly?"   
  
"I can fly?" He asks while he fells on the street   
  
I stop runing because I want to know why he was fling   
  
"mmm" I start examining him  
  
"since when you can fly?" I asked again   
  
"I don't know"   
  
"you don't know?"   
  
"yea, I just forgot that I couldn't fly" I facefault   
  
"but thats stupid"   
  
suddenly he jumps and laughts maddly  
  
"HA, IT DOESN'T MATTER NOW I WILL KILL YOU BWAHAHHAHAHAAAHAAHAAA, I WILL KILL YOU WITH THE LAST REVISION OF MI HI RYUU SHOTEN HA!!!"   
  
"What yet another revision?"   
  
"yea, BEWARE THE BEST HI RYUU SHOTEN HA!!!!" He yells dramactically whille jumpig 30 mts.   
  
"REVISED HI RYUU SHOTEN HA..." he starts absorving energy from everywhere   
  
An' when I say that he steals energy from everywhere I mean it, hell! he is stealing even my energy  
  
"HI RYUU KORIN DAMA!!!!!!!" He yelled while a HUGE blast, of a hundred times the blast he used to beat Herb,   
headed towards me   
  
"gulp"   
  
*KABOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!*   
  
*end of transmision someone stealed fanfiction.net's energy oh, yes Ranma did that*   
  
The place looks like the apocalipsis, only a yellow and black tail can be seen, well, the young Saotome can also be seen  
  
"a tail?" he asks to no one in partular (if you remember he killed everyone in the set with his blast)   
  
"a tiger tail" he responds hinsef   
  
"he was a cat?" he asks again  
  
"No a tiger!!" he answers insanely  
  
"Ha! I've beaten a tiger without the nekoken! I'm cured! I've got to celebrate! Akane! babe! Where are you?"   
  
End of the fic   
  
Hope you liked because I liked writing this fic, is my first comedy and to please C&C an' review but please,   
please don't send me bombs or virus, or that kind of things  
  
torama_san@yahoo.com 


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